We are one month into the reality of the COVID 19 pandemic in the US. March 12th was the day when "the wheels fell off the bus" fully for me. The month or so before had mentions of this virus and most of the world thought this was something happening in Asia. There is no need for me to rewrite what you all know by now. There is plenty of information and opinions out there. (maybe way too many and way too much but none the less)
I was initially going to write about the grief process through this pandemic experience and I know I sure went through it! Multiple times. But each day, week that went by I didn't feel that it was enough. There was more. And I think the more is perspective & renewal.
Grief:
Denial - the Coronavirus isn't real. It's just a bad cold or flu.
Anger - Are they seriously shutting down the world over this! This will kill the economy. They are killing everything we (I) have worked for!
Bargaining - If we stay at home 2 weeks, then it will be better and we can live as before again. I got this. Ann Frank did this for 2 years in a little room we can do 2 weeks in our homes.
Depression - woke up at night the first 3 nights with anxiety and dread. Physically felt sick. (not COVID sick) . Continued at least 2 nights per week until week 4.
Acceptance - Back & Forth "I've got this!" To now, this is real and what does the new normal look like? What opportunities lie in this new reality? "this is actually not so bad working, living, being at home & only being able to be out in the world outdoors & virtually connecting.
What have you found in this new normal?
Isolation? Fear? More togetherness? Connectedness?
I know I now have FaceTimed with our good friends in Seattle which in normal circumstances would have just been a series of texts or snapchats. Today my husband and daughter baked lemon meringue pies together for Easter. We did Easter Church with my mom in FL via FaceTime while I live-streamed our church service. Later we will have another family FaceTime and at work we are having more team meetings via Zoom and Microsoft Teams. We are actually connecting more as a group. Why didn't we do this before? It's not like the technology just appeared from the coronavirus.
What didn't we see before? Why did we only see the "can't".
"We can't meet because _________." "We can't get together because we live too far apart."
"You can't work from home because ___________." "You can't learn if you are not in class."
I am not saying this being at home and apart is the best way. What I have learned so far is that I can. That we can. That we can still move forward in many different ways and that "can't" is limiting. That distance is not limiting. We can still be together even when we are apart. And that the limiting thought process of what we think is the way it is, doesn't have to be. And sometimes, we have to be so shook up and our world turned upside down to see other perspectives and see a new path. In this there is possibility.
If you need perspective or just want someone to listen, please email me at bhoebelheinrich@gmail.com or fill out the form on this site for a free session during this COVID Pandemic.
